It's late, I'm tired, but I'm committed to getting YOU the details of my adventures. Tonight, I worked a job that I found on craigslist. Fortunately, this tale has a happy ending that doesn't involve the craigslist killer or any scams. I was hired by an indie film company as a "host" for a movie premier downtown tonight. My mom and grandmas were worried sick that I was going to die in at least one of enumerable horrifying ways, but somehow, they came to accept the fact that I was going to earn my 30 dollars working from 10:30 pm to 1:30 AM...
My job as host was to welcome movie goers to the film and to say goodbye to them as they left, and to look good. Simple enough. Unfortunately, there were only about 20 guests and roughly half of them showed up only for the short film that was shown before the feature film that I was hosting. Oh well, I got paid regardless. Now, it was never really clarified whether I was allowed to watch the movie. The actors/only people who showed up to watch it all paid for tickets, something I wasn't about to do. I was quite content to hang out with the staff of the theater (2 hipster guys in their late twenties, one of whom was playing the ukulele). But, I bounced back and forth between watching the movie, and talking to hipster 1 and 2. (Hipster 1, as it turns out, is in love with a psychopath, literally, a psychopath. He's obsessed. He even writes ukulele songs for her. If that's not commitment, I don't know what is?) Eventually hipster 1 decided he deserved a beer and a joint while working, so I headed back into the movie, permanently.
By this point, we are waaay past my bedtime. The film has shoddy videography and some pretty bad acting, but the theme was solid. It's about a gangster kid who wanted out of the drug business who gets killed and then his body gets taken by the US army and turned into the bionic man. There's more, but I fell asleep so I have no idea what happens. But, lets go back to the point where this kid gets shot. It's a drug deal gone bad and the kid gets shot, point blank, IN THE EYE...but keeps going. I disagree, writers...one does not simply walk after getting shot in the eye. You die at that point. But, just in case there is some freak way he didn't die, he gets shot another 4 times AND KEEPS GOING. It isn't until the bad guys walk past him one by one each firing another 2 or 3 shots into him that he dies. Later, when his body is recruited, the doctors say "his brain is completely intact, as are his vital organs. Apart from a few crushed bones his body is in good shape." Excuse me? What bullets crush bones and spare organs? And in what universe does getting shot in the eye not lead to some form of brain damage? Also, they talked about downloading the kid's life experiences from his brain onto a "magnetic disc" aka a CD (which, by the way, is not magnetic. CD's rely upon light, whereas cassettes used magnetism...whatever). But, the thing that got me the most, was the scientists kept saying "neuronic" when they meant "neuronal" I know...it's a silly thing to be hung up on, but if spell check tells you you're wrong, you might want to check into it. This was especially bothersome because the director said that they tried to be as scientifically accurate as possible. Anyways, the movie ends, I wake up just in time to say goodbye to everyone and all in all had a good experience.
So, I'm walking to the subway station and cross a pizza joint, selling slices of "Little Italy Pizza" for 2.75. It reminded me of Italy and how hungry I was at that point so I stopped in grabbed a slice and headed to the train. The pizza wasn't up to Italian standards but it was pretty good. But, around the fifth bite in, a rogue string of melted cheese flips down from the pizza and latches onto my chin, scalding me. I COULDN'T GET IT OFF. I now have a pretty sweet burn and a ridiculous story for how it got there.
A few random fun stories from things you see on the NYC subway late on a Saturday night:
Hookers.
Homeless people.
Drunk couples making out.
Drunk couples fighting.
Drunk single people hitting on semi-conscious or completely oblivious people.
Tweens singing "Call Me Maybe" and pleading strangers to sing along with them. (I obliged. I'm a sucker for singing with strangers.)
Some woman got angry at this guy who kept pacing up and down the subway car. He was clearly not good at interactions with people. The Call Me Maybe girls freaked him out. The woman yells at him, in front of everyone, "Just sit down or go to sleep or something. Stop pacing this car. Seriously. Stop being weird." The poor guy just kind of awkwardly smiled and literally ran away to the other side of the car, where he kept his pacing minimal and eventually sat down for a short period of time.
I love NYC. Cheers to the daily adventure and to a good night's rest.
Sunday, June 24, 2012
Thursday, June 21, 2012
Heart Warming in the Heat Wave
It is officially summer, and her in New York City boy don't we know it. It's been high nineties the past few days and it apparently feels like it's in the hundreds (thank you weather channel for rubbing it in/ validating my feelings). Meanwhile, in the heat of the city in the summer, my heart was warmed by something other than the sun. You read about things like these (I suppose like you are right now), you hear about them, but rarely ever do you get to see them.
I was chillaxing in line at the local Rite Aid pharmacy watching this little girl run around and fall and be a major nuisance to her mother/cute as a button. The mother, a young girl about my age plus/minus 3 years, got called up to pick up her prescription a little before I did. But, there was a hiccup at the checkout stand. The pills cost 3 dollars but the woman couldn't pay for them. As she was trying to ask if she could pay with a credit card, I realized that something was off with this interaction. She was deaf. Some other woman who was picking up her prescriptions leaned over and told the checkout clerk to put the deaf mom's pills on her bill. It was great to just see such genuine kindness. The mom thanked the woman in sign language, took the medication and her daughter and headed out.
It was inspiring. It makes you want to do something for other people. I really wanted to thank that woman for being so kind, but I think instead it is kind of just contagious. Maybe I'll spread it. Maybe random acts of kindness like that will just spread naturally, kind of like Pay it Forward, but more natural. Anyways, thought I'd share the story.
Cheers to the daily adventure.
I was chillaxing in line at the local Rite Aid pharmacy watching this little girl run around and fall and be a major nuisance to her mother/cute as a button. The mother, a young girl about my age plus/minus 3 years, got called up to pick up her prescription a little before I did. But, there was a hiccup at the checkout stand. The pills cost 3 dollars but the woman couldn't pay for them. As she was trying to ask if she could pay with a credit card, I realized that something was off with this interaction. She was deaf. Some other woman who was picking up her prescriptions leaned over and told the checkout clerk to put the deaf mom's pills on her bill. It was great to just see such genuine kindness. The mom thanked the woman in sign language, took the medication and her daughter and headed out.
It was inspiring. It makes you want to do something for other people. I really wanted to thank that woman for being so kind, but I think instead it is kind of just contagious. Maybe I'll spread it. Maybe random acts of kindness like that will just spread naturally, kind of like Pay it Forward, but more natural. Anyways, thought I'd share the story.
Cheers to the daily adventure.
Monday, June 18, 2012
Quickey
Thought you all might enjoy this story. You know how you can get water from soda fountains? I did that this morning. I was so proud. I had a new water bottls, I was being so healthy. Turns out, the water was carbonated! What is that? So now my air tight water bottle keeps burping since the gas pressure building inside is too much for the little membrane thing on top to handle. Cheers to the daily adventure. Here are some pics of central park and NYC streets.
Sunday, June 17, 2012
Coney island, baby
Ok, I'm trying posting from my phone since it served as my camera for today's adventures so bare with me. So today started with a trip to a pop-up store (what Is that) for suits themed after the amazing show suits. Free coffee and chips. Awesome tables with tablets in them that recognized cards. And, oh yeah, 1500 dollar suits. It was amazing. Such a great atmosphere.
Later, we headed to coney island. I grabbed a hot dog and bacon cheese fries from the famous Nathan's hot dog place that will be hosting the eating contest in about 16 days.
Then we rode some awesome rides. The girl I went with is a bit of an adrenaline junky so the three rides we went on were the most intense. See, I used to hope for a life threatening situation so I could prove myself. I wanted my work to get robbed. I wanted to have to fight for my life. I settled for just riding roller coasters. Today, on the other hand, I have a healthy attachment to my life, so these intense rides were a bit much. Dangling 100 feet in the air, all I could think about was how much it would suck if the machine broke and we plummeted to the ground below. It was a really beautiful site though. The second ride was one of those lay down super man style. But, the security thing did not click in very well. I could lean back and it would lean with me for about another five inches. Im sure it was safe but at the time I was sure I was gonna die. The 10 year old kid who was riding alone with us was laughing at me. add injury to insult, since I wear my ID badge from the hospital every where, and it clips in, it unclipped on the ride and fell fifty feet never to be seen again. Oops. The last intense ride, was the big ball that gets slingshot into the air, about 140 feet. The thirty minutes spent in line were agony. as we watched couple after couple get hurled into the air, all I could think about were the wires snapping. I was convinced I was going to die. I met a man in the line behind us, named Alex, who was pissed to go on this ride. His two fears are heights and falling. But he was more concerned about his friend, who looked like Donny Osmond, making out with his girlfriend, who looked like slightly less trashy version of Ke$ha. Apparently Donny was going to go with Kesha but promised to make out with her afterwards, causing Alex to over come his fears and go on the ride. Anyways, at the top, when you're in free fall, you can see for miles. its beautiful. The city, the sun, the ocean, just beautiful. We were higher than a kite. Literally, there was a kite flying below us. and a seagull was flying mere foot or so above us. It was an amazing 90 seconds. Alex and Kesha went after us. He looked like he was about to cry but as soon as it took off you could tell he was having fun. But, when it ended, he went back to being pissed at Donny and Kesha. We ended our coney island trip on the Ferris wheel so I could get pictures for the blog. So here they are.
We ended our day with the best chicken salad sandwiches ever...from Dunkin donuts. Seriously. We ate them on the beach at sunset. Yeah, that's my life in new York
Cheers to the daily adventure. And happy fathers day to all you dads out there.
Later, we headed to coney island. I grabbed a hot dog and bacon cheese fries from the famous Nathan's hot dog place that will be hosting the eating contest in about 16 days.
Then we rode some awesome rides. The girl I went with is a bit of an adrenaline junky so the three rides we went on were the most intense. See, I used to hope for a life threatening situation so I could prove myself. I wanted my work to get robbed. I wanted to have to fight for my life. I settled for just riding roller coasters. Today, on the other hand, I have a healthy attachment to my life, so these intense rides were a bit much. Dangling 100 feet in the air, all I could think about was how much it would suck if the machine broke and we plummeted to the ground below. It was a really beautiful site though. The second ride was one of those lay down super man style. But, the security thing did not click in very well. I could lean back and it would lean with me for about another five inches. Im sure it was safe but at the time I was sure I was gonna die. The 10 year old kid who was riding alone with us was laughing at me. add injury to insult, since I wear my ID badge from the hospital every where, and it clips in, it unclipped on the ride and fell fifty feet never to be seen again. Oops. The last intense ride, was the big ball that gets slingshot into the air, about 140 feet. The thirty minutes spent in line were agony. as we watched couple after couple get hurled into the air, all I could think about were the wires snapping. I was convinced I was going to die. I met a man in the line behind us, named Alex, who was pissed to go on this ride. His two fears are heights and falling. But he was more concerned about his friend, who looked like Donny Osmond, making out with his girlfriend, who looked like slightly less trashy version of Ke$ha. Apparently Donny was going to go with Kesha but promised to make out with her afterwards, causing Alex to over come his fears and go on the ride. Anyways, at the top, when you're in free fall, you can see for miles. its beautiful. The city, the sun, the ocean, just beautiful. We were higher than a kite. Literally, there was a kite flying below us. and a seagull was flying mere foot or so above us. It was an amazing 90 seconds. Alex and Kesha went after us. He looked like he was about to cry but as soon as it took off you could tell he was having fun. But, when it ended, he went back to being pissed at Donny and Kesha. We ended our coney island trip on the Ferris wheel so I could get pictures for the blog. So here they are.Cheers to the daily adventure. And happy fathers day to all you dads out there.
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
NYC and Me
Sorry to those of you who were hoping for more frequent updates, but new York is turning out to be pretty relaxing. I made it down to central park which was amazing and felt the subway pass below me as the ground shook. Ive continued hunting for a second job. Ive gotten caught in New York traffic so an hour trip to Newark airport turned into two and a half hours (my friends made their flight with 10 minutes to spare.)
Nothing, this weekend was really blog worthy. But the last 12 hours have proven a bit more thrilling. One of my friends who's from Miami and is spending the summer in the upper west side of New York came by to check out my apartment and to pick up a bag of his shoes I brought up for him. As he gets off the subway he shoots me a text "I'm never coming back here. Im surprised they did not check my passport ay the border." The guy who helped me hang out on rooftop poolside was now experiencing how the other half lived and it was culture shock. I offered to drive him to the train station when he was leaving so he would not have to brave the streets of the Bronx at night.
Back at home, I could not find a place to park on the right side of the street (the left side gets ticketed on Tuesdays and Fridays because it gets street cleaned.) I resigned myself to driving to work. I swear, overnight the number of cars in the Bronx doubled. There was not a parking place the whole way to work. At some point, I got caught between a set of double parked cars and a diagonally parked garbage truck. AND, the guy behind me kept honking AT ME! Are you serious? There is maybe 3 feet between the truck and the double parked car, I cant fit through that and neither can you, minivan driver. Whatever, I'm over it.
Anyways, I finally found a parking spot near a fire hydrant (but not too near this time). But, I didn't quite know how to get from where I parked to where I worked. I knew the general direction, but not the specific route. I cut through this side ally next to a police station, but ended up in a fenced-in parking lot. As I meaner around, out the other exit, I realize that I am in the parking lot for the police station. One of the gars flips on the sirens to let me know I'm her way so I move over to let her pass and keep walking out. She flips on her siren again when I'm out, and I think, Jeeze lady I'm already out of your way leave me alone. I keep walking and she shouts out her window "Yo, are you lost." Thank God! Someone helpful! "Yes, I am. I'm trying to get to the Kennedy Center from here." "Oh I just had to make sure since you were technically trespassing." At this point, we are joined by a man cop who responds to my "I'm sorry I didn't realize" with "the signs didn't throw you off?" No, buddy, they didn't because, upon further inspection when I was walking back to my car, they don't say no trespassing merely "police station, beware of cars." "No sorry, I came in on the other side" "They're there too." "Oh, sorry. Well, how do I get where I'm going?" "Take your next right"
The next right turned out to be the fire department. Seriously? Out of the frying pan into the fire...department. But, they were much cooler (no pun intended) and let me through without issue. Moreover, after all this, I come home to an email from the New York Department of Finance about that first parking ticket I got that read "The respondent has been charged with violating Traffic Rule 4-08(e)(2) prohibiting stopping, standing or parking a vehicle within fifteen feet of a fire hydrant. Respondent's claim that he is from out of state and was unfamiliar with the parking regulations in New York City is not a meritorious defense to the violation. Area within fifteen feet of a hydrant is a general no stopping zone. Signs or markigns are not required. Claim that the vehicle was parked temporarily as he was moving items into his new apartment fails to provide a meritorious defense to the cited regulation. Summons upheld. No reduction." So, apparently, they can have laws specific to their state, don't have to let you know about them in any way, and can still hold you accountable.
But, it's okay. I'm in NYC, center of the Universe, heart of culture, and thought, and finance, and loads of other things and I'm having the time of my life. Cheers to the daily adventure. Pics to come, I swear!
Nothing, this weekend was really blog worthy. But the last 12 hours have proven a bit more thrilling. One of my friends who's from Miami and is spending the summer in the upper west side of New York came by to check out my apartment and to pick up a bag of his shoes I brought up for him. As he gets off the subway he shoots me a text "I'm never coming back here. Im surprised they did not check my passport ay the border." The guy who helped me hang out on rooftop poolside was now experiencing how the other half lived and it was culture shock. I offered to drive him to the train station when he was leaving so he would not have to brave the streets of the Bronx at night.
Back at home, I could not find a place to park on the right side of the street (the left side gets ticketed on Tuesdays and Fridays because it gets street cleaned.) I resigned myself to driving to work. I swear, overnight the number of cars in the Bronx doubled. There was not a parking place the whole way to work. At some point, I got caught between a set of double parked cars and a diagonally parked garbage truck. AND, the guy behind me kept honking AT ME! Are you serious? There is maybe 3 feet between the truck and the double parked car, I cant fit through that and neither can you, minivan driver. Whatever, I'm over it.
Anyways, I finally found a parking spot near a fire hydrant (but not too near this time). But, I didn't quite know how to get from where I parked to where I worked. I knew the general direction, but not the specific route. I cut through this side ally next to a police station, but ended up in a fenced-in parking lot. As I meaner around, out the other exit, I realize that I am in the parking lot for the police station. One of the gars flips on the sirens to let me know I'm her way so I move over to let her pass and keep walking out. She flips on her siren again when I'm out, and I think, Jeeze lady I'm already out of your way leave me alone. I keep walking and she shouts out her window "Yo, are you lost." Thank God! Someone helpful! "Yes, I am. I'm trying to get to the Kennedy Center from here." "Oh I just had to make sure since you were technically trespassing." At this point, we are joined by a man cop who responds to my "I'm sorry I didn't realize" with "the signs didn't throw you off?" No, buddy, they didn't because, upon further inspection when I was walking back to my car, they don't say no trespassing merely "police station, beware of cars." "No sorry, I came in on the other side" "They're there too." "Oh, sorry. Well, how do I get where I'm going?" "Take your next right"
The next right turned out to be the fire department. Seriously? Out of the frying pan into the fire...department. But, they were much cooler (no pun intended) and let me through without issue. Moreover, after all this, I come home to an email from the New York Department of Finance about that first parking ticket I got that read "The respondent has been charged with violating Traffic Rule 4-08(e)(2) prohibiting stopping, standing or parking a vehicle within fifteen feet of a fire hydrant. Respondent's claim that he is from out of state and was unfamiliar with the parking regulations in New York City is not a meritorious defense to the violation. Area within fifteen feet of a hydrant is a general no stopping zone. Signs or markigns are not required. Claim that the vehicle was parked temporarily as he was moving items into his new apartment fails to provide a meritorious defense to the cited regulation. Summons upheld. No reduction." So, apparently, they can have laws specific to their state, don't have to let you know about them in any way, and can still hold you accountable.
But, it's okay. I'm in NYC, center of the Universe, heart of culture, and thought, and finance, and loads of other things and I'm having the time of my life. Cheers to the daily adventure. Pics to come, I swear!
Monday, June 4, 2012
The Great New York Adventure
I made it. I am finally in the Big City! Well, actually I'm in the Bronx, but close enough right? I'm sitting in my living room on a couch that came with the apartment I'm renting. I live in a cozy two bedroom apartment, and cozy in the good way not the New-York-I-don't-have-enough-room-way. Granted, my view from my windows is of our trash filled back yard but hey you win some you lose some. Anyways, even though I've only been in NYC for a week now, I have already learned a bunch of little lessons and one overarching theme.
First: driving in New York is miserable. Now, Men's Health Magazine may rate New York drivers as the safest, but coming into the city, I was much more fearful for my life than in Italy with the magic cars. But, driving into the city, crossing the George Washington Bridge (possibly on the wrong level) I could see the New York skyline, the classic image of man and nature standing and swirling together in beautiful harmony contrasted against the chaos of the road and I was in love. See, I've had a poster of the NYC skyline hanging on my wall the past 2 years and I've wanted to end up here for quite some time and, though the skyline looks a bit different (the poster was pre-2001) it still did the trick.
But beauty of it aside, here in the Bronx, the majesty of the city gives way to tired buildings and dangerous streets in more than one way. Here in the Bronx, the streets aren't painted! Seriously. The lanes are up for you to decide. It's like the Seinfeld episode when one of the lead guys sponsors a piece of highway and paints over over the lines to make it more luxurious. Here, though, there is no luxury just confusion and chaos, but hey life is an adventure, why shouldn't driving be? I've never been one for road rage, but the traffic here has caused me to shout some phrases that would make Steve Stiffler blush.
Second: moving in sucks
Somehow, we survive the drive through Manhattan (I was blessed enough to have my father riding with me). After we finish getting all of my stuff into the apartment, sweating, we bumbled down to my car to go get food to find a nice surprise on my windshield. My first New York parking ticket! I was too close to a fire hydrant (they don't clearly mark them here). The fine assessed by the state of New York? One-hundred-fifteen dollars. Whether I'll have to pay all of it is still up in the air.
Overarching theme (since I'm kind of sick of writing this): Life is full of unexpectedness. You have to just roll with the punches. For example, on Saturday, I was planning on going to visit Strands (a used book store with over 8 miles of books) and Central Park. What ended up happening? I met a friend and his friend in an exclusive club called the SoHo House and ended up relaxing next to a roof-top pool (one of only 3 in NYC) with some 30-year old Australian women and Argentinian models. Another example of unexpectedness? I came home from work today and was followed by a man from a different apartment into mine. He asked if he could come in then sort of just came in without waiting for a response. He comes in and starts moving things out of my sink and turns it on, leaves it running, and leaves with a promise to come back. Kay? He comes back with another guy and a tool. They duck under my sink and start unscrewing pipes and then jamming the tool into the pipes and snaking the drains. But after about 30 or so minutes of this, it wasn't enough so they both leave with a promise of coming back and come back with a bigger machine and another guy. They snake the pipes again with the bigger machine and stand around talking and eating for the next two hours. They leave, tell me to not use my sink, and tell me they'll come back the next morning.
Cheers to the daily adventure (pics to come, I haven't forgotten about the tower of Pisa).
First: driving in New York is miserable. Now, Men's Health Magazine may rate New York drivers as the safest, but coming into the city, I was much more fearful for my life than in Italy with the magic cars. But, driving into the city, crossing the George Washington Bridge (possibly on the wrong level) I could see the New York skyline, the classic image of man and nature standing and swirling together in beautiful harmony contrasted against the chaos of the road and I was in love. See, I've had a poster of the NYC skyline hanging on my wall the past 2 years and I've wanted to end up here for quite some time and, though the skyline looks a bit different (the poster was pre-2001) it still did the trick.
But beauty of it aside, here in the Bronx, the majesty of the city gives way to tired buildings and dangerous streets in more than one way. Here in the Bronx, the streets aren't painted! Seriously. The lanes are up for you to decide. It's like the Seinfeld episode when one of the lead guys sponsors a piece of highway and paints over over the lines to make it more luxurious. Here, though, there is no luxury just confusion and chaos, but hey life is an adventure, why shouldn't driving be? I've never been one for road rage, but the traffic here has caused me to shout some phrases that would make Steve Stiffler blush.
Second: moving in sucks
Somehow, we survive the drive through Manhattan (I was blessed enough to have my father riding with me). After we finish getting all of my stuff into the apartment, sweating, we bumbled down to my car to go get food to find a nice surprise on my windshield. My first New York parking ticket! I was too close to a fire hydrant (they don't clearly mark them here). The fine assessed by the state of New York? One-hundred-fifteen dollars. Whether I'll have to pay all of it is still up in the air.
Overarching theme (since I'm kind of sick of writing this): Life is full of unexpectedness. You have to just roll with the punches. For example, on Saturday, I was planning on going to visit Strands (a used book store with over 8 miles of books) and Central Park. What ended up happening? I met a friend and his friend in an exclusive club called the SoHo House and ended up relaxing next to a roof-top pool (one of only 3 in NYC) with some 30-year old Australian women and Argentinian models. Another example of unexpectedness? I came home from work today and was followed by a man from a different apartment into mine. He asked if he could come in then sort of just came in without waiting for a response. He comes in and starts moving things out of my sink and turns it on, leaves it running, and leaves with a promise to come back. Kay? He comes back with another guy and a tool. They duck under my sink and start unscrewing pipes and then jamming the tool into the pipes and snaking the drains. But after about 30 or so minutes of this, it wasn't enough so they both leave with a promise of coming back and come back with a bigger machine and another guy. They snake the pipes again with the bigger machine and stand around talking and eating for the next two hours. They leave, tell me to not use my sink, and tell me they'll come back the next morning.
Cheers to the daily adventure (pics to come, I haven't forgotten about the tower of Pisa).
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